Things I Have Really Been Asked

Every single one of the items in this list is something that I’ve been asked to do in at one point or another during the last four years of my professional life.  No items are embellished, only specific details are left out to protect the person making the request.

Funny questions I’ve been asked

  • “How do I make my site come up first when you type …… in Google?”
  • “Google doesn’t have the full name of the public safety building on their map, can you change it?”
  • “My son was listed in the Parethenon as having been arrested for a crime in 1999. His name is still in their newspaper, can you remove it?”
  • “Do you have a copy of the 1954 Chief Justice that you can send me?” – You mean online?  “No, an actual copy.”
  • “Why doesn’t my course in MUOnline have any content in it?”  – How long ago did you create the content?   “What?”
  • “I’ve been asked to create a site for my department, and I have a couple of questions.”   Sure, what can I help you with.  “Well, first off, how do you build a web page?”
  • “My cable company is blocking me from connecting to anything at Marshall. Can you help?”

Weird phone calls I’ve recieved

  • “Can you tell me where you go to get a new copy of your drivers license?”
  • “Is this Marshall IT?”  Yes, how can I help you?   “Do you remember my son…..?  He worked there 12 years ago and thinks he might have left a computer disk there.”
  • “I’m calling for my son – he can’t get connected to the internet.”   Oh, ok, is he using his connection for his phone?   “Oh, no, he’s over in Tower’s, he just asked me to call.”
  • “Is this the WV State Police?”  No, this is Marshall University.  “Well, my daughter was murdered three years ago, and I think I know who did it, I need to talk to someone about what I’ve found out.”   Ok, well, this is the IT department at Marshall University.   Do you need me to help you find the number for the State Police?

Weird walk up questions

  • “Do you know where I can find books on tape?”
  • “Do you have any Clorox bleach?”
  • “Did you just see a mouse run by?”
  • “Did you see any rain dripping through the ceiling?”
  • “Is there any food in your office?”

Things heard over my cubicle wall over the years

  • Whispers (like the others on LOST)
  • “Jackass!”
  • “I’ve got all things that are good.”
  • “I’m old Greeeeggg.”
  • “I Wanna know where the Gold at”
  • “Bacon!”

It’s never boring, that’s for sure.


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